pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
