i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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