how can u be prego again
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
