Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
