Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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