I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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