ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
