yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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