Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Randomize
