all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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