I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize