I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
