I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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