He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
