My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
