he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
