I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Randomize
