Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
