I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
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