I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
