what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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