I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
