I heard we made out
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
