3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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