if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
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