I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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