These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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