Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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