I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
He? As in you personified your dick?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
