I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
