Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
