He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
