Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize