so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
we should paint friendship bongs
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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