i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize