my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
