just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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