And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
