is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
