All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Found your dick twin last night
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
