you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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