home. puking in laundry basket.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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