she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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