So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
