i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
please don't ironically join a cult
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