Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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