You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
That accounts for only three of the penises
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
