Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
