i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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