my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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