Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
